2011年5月29日 星期日

Expressing an opinion -2

  When it comes to whether students should wear uniforms to school, I am favor of the opposite side.  To begin with, in my opinion, every student insists on his or her own style of clothes; as a result, if schools don't limit the students to uniforms, it will be a mess in the campus.  In addition, I find it convenient to tell which school the students come from; owing to this, they will behave themselves outside.  Moreover, as long as it won't be a trouble to worry about what to wear the next day, it does save a lot of time on choosing the clothes every morning.  Last but not the least, since students all wear the same uniforms, the security in the campus will make both their parents and the teachers can breathe a sing of relief as the strangers who may want to commit crimes will be easily recognized.  To sum up, I believe that the benefits that students wearing uniforms brings are absolutely more.

8 則留言:

  1. I am favor of the opposite side. 你是支持的,opposite 不對唷xDD 不過開頭我覺得很棒:D!!

    整體無誤很順暢很棒唷!!~~~





    結論句還是怪怪xD

    回覆刪除
  2. I am favor of the opposite side.
    >> I am in favor of the opposite side.

    第一句的語意怪怪的耶
    因為你說
    當談到學生是否該穿制服上學的時候
    我是贊成反面的
    可是你沒有明確的說學生該穿或不該穿制服
    所以你的反面是什麼會讓讀者混淆唷@@

    Moreover, as long as it won't be a trouble to worry about what to wear the next day
    這裡的as long as的語意耶怪怪的喔
    因為這句的話的意思好像是
    此外 只要這不會變成一個麻煩來擔心隔天要穿什麼
    這的確節省了時間每早都挑選衣服
    應該是把as long as 改成because或for比較適合吧0.0

    the security in the campus will make both their parents and the teachers can breathe a sing of relief
    這裡的can是不是放錯了啊@@因為多了can有點怪怪的

    I believe that the benefits that students wearing uniforms brings are absolutely more.
    這裡的wearing應該當作原型吧@@
    然後最後一句看不懂意思xD

    回覆刪除
  3. 還滿通順的耶...
    the security in the ....這句還真長0.0
    看要不要修一下

    回覆刪除
  4. To sum up, I believe that the benefits that students wearing uniforms brings are absolutely more.>>>唯獨這句我有點看不懂意思耶!!

    其餘都寫的很好
    很有調理順序

    回覆刪除
  5. 1.favor of -->in favor of
    2.if schools don't limit the students to uniforms
    to後面應該加一個wear會比較通順
    3.I find it convenient to tell which school the students come from.雖然這句沒有錯,可是語意很奇怪,倒裝得有點怪。可以改I find it easy to recognize students of different schools.
    還有像xuan說的,你第一句反面那個誤導我了,要講清楚喔
    4.as long as it won't be a trouble to worry about what to wear the next day, it does save a lot of time on choosing the clothes every morning. 這句有語病。加"只要"很奇怪
    5.since students all wear the same uniforms, the security in the campus will make both their parents and the teachers can breathe a sing of relief as the strangers who may want to commit crimes will be easily recognized.
    make後面不加can,直接接原v即可。
    然後我覺得這句的寫法不太好喔
    will be easily recognized可以省略不然有點冗長。
    6.I believe that the benefits that students wearing uniforms brings are absolutely more.
    這個寫法有點刁鑽..好像是刻意去把句子修美的感覺喔
    就好像明明可以不用倒裝的句子卻把它倒裝了的意思~
    I believe that the benefits of students wearing uniforms bring more than what I mentioned.
    這篇比較有問題喔:(

    回覆刪除
  6. To begin with, in my opinion,
    這兩個是不是擇一就好?

    To sum up, I believe that the benefits that students wearing uniforms brings are absolutely more.
    結尾可以用講義上的其他用法~
    來加強文章的結尾~

    列點增加了文章的整齊度~

    回覆刪除
  7. When it comes to whether students should wear uniforms to school, I am favor of the opposite side(favor後面要加上in喔)

    Last but not the least, since students all wear the same uniforms, the security in the campus will make both their parents and the teachers can breathe a sing of relief as the strangers who may want to commit crimes will be easily recognized不知道為什麼我覺得你的這句感覺有點冗長~感覺一直在重複說同一件事只是換了個說法((跟其他句感覺有相同的意思><

    回覆刪除
  8. 其實我覺得整個還滿通順的欸:P

    回覆刪除